Utah: As Bad As I Wanna Be

Okay, so, many of you know that I rode through Idaho for 60 miles and decided to rent a car and skip ahead to Salt Lake City. Idaho is pretty much the only state with no cross-state secondary highways, forcing me to ride on the I-84 for great distances, which was dangerous and unpleasant. And I'm no longer in the business of doing things I don't like. The drive today confirmed that I made the right decision. Scary cross-wind, trucks with three trailers, gravel covered shoulders, dust storm warnings, etc. Idaho is bad news. Not to mention boring as cuss.

An Open Letter to the Oregon Department of Transportation

I realize that we are living in "these economic times" but seriously, ODOT, you need to consider some badly needed upgrades to your transportation infrastructure. Having now ridden 900 miles, I feel as though I hold some authority when it comes to road quality; please take the following as expert testimony.

One state down...

Well, this is the inaugural post on my retooled blog, featuring highlights (and lowlights) from my adventure on two wheels.

SATS goes on the road!

So, I moved away from Edmonton. But that doesn't mean the hilarity and libel lawsuits have to stop. I'm going to be traveling for a while, probably a long while. But there is bound to be bad service in other places, right? I won't have to just enjoy everything I do, will I?

So keep tuning in for crass, unfounded global commentary. Or else.

The Best Liquor Store in Edmonton

I realize I am inviting a hailstorm of pissed-offedness upon myself but I don't care. City Centre Liquor Store, located close to Eddie Bauer in the east portion of Edmonton City Centre Mall, is the best liquor store in the city. Hands down. Without a doubt. Probably. Why? Customer service, you monkeys.

Stars

There are few bands who produce consistently good albums over a long career. Radiohead is in there. Modest Mouse is pretty good at not sucking. Beck. Neil Young. But a lot of bands are either around for a long time, making the same ridiculous, boring album over and over again (Aerosmith, AC/DC, Rolling Stones); or they release one great album and each subsequent album serves only to detract from the success of the first (Interpol); or they release a brilliant album and more or less disappear, a la J.D. Salinger (Neutral Milk Hotel). With the release of The Five Ghosts, Stars may have solidified their status as a quality act with the longevity to call it a career.

Transcendental Stimulation

Transcend Coffee's Garneau location opened last week in the old Pharos Pizza unit next to the Garneau Theatre. This is good. This is what we've all been waiting for. And don't get me wrong, I appreciate not having to drive all the way to godforsaken 62 Avenue and 98 Street to get a cup of Clover coffee (now owned by Starbucks - boo). But seriously, what in Jesus' name took so long? When you see the phrase "Coming Soon" you kind of assume that "soon" means "before I go crazy from unrequited coffee lust." Apparently not so.

It's summer, let's dress like idiots!

The long, cold winter in Edmonton has a way of tricking human physiology into believing the weather is warmer than it actually is. Any normal subset of human beings goes outside in 10C weather and thinks, "it's quite medium out today, perhaps I need a jacket." But in Edmonton, as soon as the mercury crawls above zero, people like to pretend that they live somewhere that serves more drinks with umbrellas in them. And this produces a few distinct characters you are likely to see around town.

Huzzah! for Yellow Pages Group Co.

In a stunning announcement last week, YPG Co. indicated they would no longer automatically deliver white pages to Edmonton and area homes. Not stunning, you say? Perhaps you are correct, sir. But still, this is good news for people who like trees, hate clutter, and who have even the faintest working knowledge of the interwebs. However, there are still a few remaining white(pages)supremacists.

Places I Like to Eat Lunch: Shanghai Express

There is something about shiny food that intrigues me. Fruit and veg can be shiny, but that's not what I'm talking about. I mean artificial shine; when people intentionally shine up their food, like a bowling ball or a nice pair of shoes, it makes me want to eat it. I can't explain why. And Shanghai Express makes the shiniest food around.